Social Customs

Since marriage plays a significant role in establishing the entire family’s
economic and social standing, mate selection is a way of forging connections
between kinship groups. As such it is considered too important to
be left to the individuals involved. Consequently, mate selection, marriage
negotiations and rituals are usually handled by the title-holders of the
kingdom, especially lineage heads (bütabütsey).

The suitor’s father explains the purpose of his visit. As required by tradition, he will normally express himself using figurative language – as an example: “The purpose of my visit is to inform you that I have seen a banana in your compound that I would like to harvest.”

During the first official visit to the woman’s compound, her father will invite her into
his sitting-room and present his guest to her, explaining the purpose of his
visit. He will ask the woman to take the wine her suitor’s father has brought
and pour it into his own drinking-horn. He will then sip a little and give the
rest to her. When she finishes drinking the wine in the cup, the father will
ask her to refill it. He will then drink again, give it to her and then ask her
to give the rest to the suitor’s father. If she does so

The procession normally carries two sets of lighted raffia torches (nka’a); the people crack jokes as they move along in the bridal train. A representative of the bride’s maternal grandfather carries one of the torches at the tail end of the procession, while that of the bride’s father takes the lead. The bride is hidden in the middle of the procession as they move forward: she usually carries a bag containing an ancestral cup or a drinking horn.

In Mankon as well as in the Grassland as a whole, twin children are generally regarded as a blessing for the family that has them. It is a custom that, as soon as a woman gives birth to twins, she acquires the title Maa ngyie, while her husband is given that of Taa ngyie. Thus if the woman’s name is Ngum, she is known as Maa ngyie Ngum, and if the man’s name is Awah, he is called Taa ngyie Awah. The birth of twins changes the status of the parents: in fact, the mother of the twin children can enter the palace with out performing the myie ritual, which grants anyone the privilege of clapping and speaking directly to the king.